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Things Will Always Get Better!

Well I’ve been neglecting my blogs lately, I’ve always been a bit of a procrastinator! But here I am, better late than never and a bit more positive than last time!
The husband has gotten a new job which pays slightly better. It’s only a stopgap because he is in the running for another job which pays exceptionally more than both and offers more in the way of promotion. So finger’s crossed on that one, we may just get out of the financial shit creek we’re in!

Anyhow, thinking positively, my crafting is going well, especially the crochet blankets and rice charms, it’s so rewarding when people appreciate something you spend so much time and effort creating.

The school holidays are going well, we’ve had some great days out.  A group of us had a picnic in the park for a friends birthday, the kids played happily and the princess juice was flowing for us mums, it was one of those carefree days where everyone’s happy.
Then we had the pirate adventure in the woods… 7 adults and 11 kiddies = another great day out.
We’ve had a few days in the park that became more hours than planned but I love it when you don’t have to check the time and you’re engrossed in good conversations with friends.

My cousin is coming out of care this month and as I write to her, I’m hoping for a meeting at some point. Some details in her files sit badly with me as I know she was blamed for things she didn’t do and I want her to know the truth, there is no reason for a child to be blamed for another child’s injury when it was one of the parents, it is disgraceful. I can’t wait to see how she’s grown and how she’s doing. I can’t wait to tell her what a precious little girl she was and how we love her and truly missed her. How we have a photo of her in our living room right next to her cousins. I want her to know we never forgot her. And most of all, I don’t want her to feel like I did when I was her age…

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A Sunshine Award to start off the Summer!

When I started this blog, it was for a few reasons… Firstly, I guess it was just because I like to write, it’s something I enjoy doing almost as much as I like reading.  It’s also a form of therapy for me… I write about things and those things become clearer in my mind.

The thing is, for some reason, it hadn’t occurred to me that people might actually read it! So imagine my surprise when I checked my emails today to find a Sunshine Award from fellow blogger justbetweencousins!

I’d like to say a big Thank You (!) for nominating me for the Sunshine Award and for actually taking the time to read my thoughts on here, it’s much appreciated!

Now, in accordance with the Sunshine Award Rules, I agree to;

  • Include the Sunshine Award image. (check)
  • Thank the person who gave you the award. (check)
  • Answer 10 questions about yourself. (Apparently, the giver can make up new ones. It could get interesting!) (check)
  • Pass the award on to 10 Sunshine-worthy bloggers (Only 10?!) (check)
The Questions…

Love or Money? Love (can I have some money thrown in?… no?… okay just love!)

Favorite Book? I love childhood memoirs, my favourite being Ugly by Constance Briscoe.

Who is the Television Character you simply adore? Waynetta Slob… Kathy Burke is truly a comedy genius! (Though I do love Nan Taylor too, Catherine Tate is too funny!)

Favorite Music? I love strong women that say it how it is. Pink, Linda Perry, Eva Cassidy, Jessie J and Amy Winehouse to name a few.

Favorite type of movie? I like comedies best, thrillers are great but NOT horrors!!

Facebook or Twitter? ooohh, I can’t decide, I love both… facebook just edges it… for now!

Favorite number? 13. I was born on the 13th so consider it my lucky number!

Favourite Animal? Horses, I love them just because they are so beautiful.

Giving or receiving? Totally giving, I just wish I could afford to give some more!

Favorite flower? Poppy… that’s why I named my daughter Poppy!

And last but certainly not least, here is my list of Sunshine Award bloggers in absolutely no particular order…

One Fierce Mama I love Mummy blogs, they give us mums a way of expressing ourselves and proves there is a lot more to us than ‘nappies and baby sick’! I especially like the ones that keep it real!

Journey to my Heart… a day to day discovery we’re around the same age and have so many things in common, yet are so different. It’s refreshing and interesting to read about someone that you feel even the smallest connection to.

Heaven 4 Earth I love reading things that make me think… truly think on a really deep level. This is a blog that makes me think.

A Three Day Hat Another Mummy (or Mommy!) blog that ‘tells it how it is’!

Grenglish I went to school with Sarah and though we weren’t in the same circle of friends, the power of Facebook put me in touch with her blog… brilliantly written and touches on subjects everyone can relate to.

Cathy’s Voice Now I love her honesty and her fearlessness when it comes to her sharing her voice.

Texas Gaga because repurposing and upcycling is a dying art… but the only way we’ll save our planet…

Precious Paper A new blog but proof that upcycling is beautiful!

Missy B & Family She is ME!  But she makes it much more interesting!

Pearlyqueennotebook reworking beautiful things… I need say no more than that!

These Bloggers old and new have caught my interest, inspired me, or made me look at my own life differently. I think that’s an amazing talent to possess and should be recognised.

Enjoy your Sunshine Award nominations and pass it on.

 
 

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Some Facts About Me…

My name means ‘Angel’ so I collect anything to do with angels.

Flanagan is a nickname that means red-haired one.

I also collect key-rings from everywhere I go and all my pals buy me one when they go anywhere!!

I have a VERY strong personality! It takes a very strong man to stand beside such a strong woman.

I am VERY opinionated!!

My dad is the only person I have ever hated.

I was in care for 15 years.

I did drugs for years. (but despise them now.)

I can’t stand people that judge me before really getting to know me.

But I am often guilty of judging someone before I really know them… I feel SO guilty after that I usually apologise and tell them why!

I am still on a journey of self-discovery.

I love reading childhood memoirs & survivor stories, I hope to write my own book in the not too distant future.

My glass is always half-full.

I don’t take anything in life seriously.

I am left-handed.

I LOVE British films, they’re so under-rated.

I wish I’d never lost touch with old friends. (I love facebook for reuniting me with some of them.)

I can’t abide liars and thieves.

I love all vegetables!

I am the proud mother of 4 sons and a daughter. (and it still amazes me!) they are all very special to me in their individual ways, and like any Mum I think my children are better than anyone else’s!

I was a ‘new mum’ in my teens, 20’s and 30’s!!

I am a bit of an ‘Earth Mother’…. natural birth, babywearing, blw, breastfeeding, cloth nappies etc.

I have 9 tattoos (3 were cover-ups so technically I had 12!!) and 13 piercings.

I HATE HATE HATE Marmite!!!!!!!! YUK!!

I HATE horror films so much that I have to watch something nice after, or I have nightmares!!

I LOVED being an Army Wife.

I HATED being an Army Wife!

I am a stereotypical red-haired, scorpio with Irish heritage… RED HOT TEMPER!!! LOL

I am extremely loyal to my family and friends.

I don’t tolerate any type of ignorance… there’s no room in my life for them.

Much to everyone’s annoyance, I analyse everything and everyone in my life!!

I have Bambakomallophobia… I am SO scared of cotton wool!!! YES, REALLY!!! lol

School days were NOT the best days of my life! Teenage years are the worst!!!

I have the BEST friends in the world!! OF course!!! Some of my best friends have passed away over the last few years, I will try never to lose touch with friends again.

I am addicted to E-BAY!!!!!! I cannot live without it!!!!

I have very few regrets…’Don’t regret the things you do…Regret the things you DON’T do’… Fabulous philosophy.

I am a VERY philosophical person, more so than most.

I am a TERRIBLE singer!!!

I miss London so much. I love Starbucks, Pure Waffle, being able to walk to Camden Market and sitting on Primrose Hill with a good book. etc.

I have a very sarcastic sense of humour… some people miss the humour bit! (ooops!) but I never mean offence.

I love nothing better than a good book, a coffee and some peace at the end of the day.

I love blogging as it gives me such an insight into my friends lives.

When I’m happy, I’m on a crazy high… when I’m down, I’m desperately depressed.

I suffer with C-PTSD

I think there’s no excuse for bad manners, I hate it when people push past me… and then even worse, when they don’t apologise.

You can read my mood by how I’m dressed and how my house looks…

I try to raise my kids to be independent, tolerant, domesticated, polite and to embrace their individuality. I think I’m succeeding so far.

I am very insecure though I have learnt to appear confident to those that don’t know me.

I can be sooooo immature… and I don’t care what people think. I’m not dead yet!!

I love the Disney store and Hamleys!

My best night out goes like this… meal, West End Show, drink, walking back home a bit tipsy!!

I am a bit OCD. I have to plan everything, I hate changes to my routine, I do almost everything in even numbers (but my favourite number is 13!?!) & I love the smell of bleach, Milton and Dettol!!

I really hate cooking… I hate cleaning the kitchen after dinner more!

Army wives really do have it hard, no-one realises that.

I am a worrier, I even worry that I worry too much!

I always try to understand the other persons point of view and get upset when others don’t do the same.

I have always preferred humour to good looks in a man, looks will fade with age… humour only gets better!

I have always talked WAY too much!!

… and waffled on & on!!

I get passionate about certain subjects and go on about them a bit when the conversation starts!!

The smallest things can aggravate me!

Although I am working class and I live in a council house, I DO look down my nose at those that cannot be bothered to work and live on typically rough council estates… THEY made those estates rough, areas only get ‘rough’ when the residents don’t give a sh*t about the way they live and it really pisses me off.

I love a good debate, it exercises the brain cells!

The 3 most important goals in my life are:

…..1) To be settled in a loving relationship.

…..2) To be the best Mother I could be. (well, I am still trying!)

…..3) To start my own business.

I hate women swearing, but I do all the time.

I smoked way too much. (I quit in January 2011!)

I am such a craft-geek!! … anything to do with fabric and amigurumi!!

I love to shop!! I love buying things for people, I always see things for friends/family when I’m out and I always wish I had more money!

I write lists about EVERYTHING!!!

Though I lived in London for 37 years and used it almost daily, I am petrified of the tube!! (London Underground, that is!)

But in all I love London Transport! (I miss it much!)

I am never serious for very long.

I carry my life in my handbag… and a load of crap that I never use but ‘may come in handy’!!! ie. swiss army knife thingy, 1st aid kit, nazar boncuğu, babywipes, handgel and more that I’m too embarrassed to admit!! then there’s the usual…diary, makeup, brush, mirror, keys, mobile phone, purse etc. (LOL see more OCD!!)

I love coffee. Not cheap coffee… but the kind that you get from the little cafés in St Johns Wood & Hampstead. (well, if they’re gonna spend £6 million on a house, they ain’t gonna drink shit coffee!!!!)

I am a bit of a snob. I can’t afford to live the lifestyle that I love & that’s probably why I miss living in St Johns Wood so much.

A lot of people have had a huge impact on me, by giving little bits of wisdom and they probably don’t know how much it has affected my life in a positive way. Some of them have been children… kids sometimes have the answers… if you take the time to listen.

I don’t drink often, unless I am in a social situation… even then I don’t always drink.

I have had LOADS of driving lessons and I STILL can’t drive!!! I think some people just aren’t cut out for it! (like those people you swear & curse at on the road!)

I still feel I have a lot to learn about life, and I believe in the sayings “you live and learn” & “you learn something new every day” I think the most unexpected people you can learn from are children.

I didn’t have a very good childhood but I feel it was the life I was ‘meant to have’. It has made me a very tolerant and understanding person.

I hate it when people use their bad pasts as an excuse to be an ‘arsehole’

I love roses, daisies, lilies and poppies…. but I can’t stand flowery things in general. (curtains, wallpaper etc.)

I come across as a very closed off person emotionally but on my own I am an emotional wreck!

I am (& always have been) a daydreamer. I’m so good at it!!

Christmas is my favourite time of year, it is so magical when you have children. I get so hyped up that I even convince myself that Santa is real!!

I am a very spiritual person.

I believe that some of the most aesthetically beautiful people (on the outside) are the most ugly people on the inside and vice versa.

The friends that have touched my heart… Tammy, (she’ll always be my best childhood friend), Shirley (we went through those awful teenage years together), Jane (we learned how to be parents… & adults together! RIP old pal), Angie (the best listener in the world & knows how to make me laugh!), Ray (he was my rock and he never even knew it), Nicki (got each other through some devastating times), Andy (a real good friend, always there when you need a pal to catch a movie! RIP Drew mate), Ann (I never showed her how much I appreciated what she did for me, it was a tough time), Elise (Made me laugh at a time when I thought I’d never smile again), Emma (café buddy & circle-slut. lol), Michelle (I should be a better pal to you) Love them all.

I think the problem with this country is down to bad parenting and lack of role-models. Parents want to be their kids best mate… Do they think their kids need parents or more friends? Can their kids not find their own friends? We are parents, it’s a job, start parenting your kids people!!!

I fall pregnant WAY too easily!!!

Being a teenage Mum was way harder than I thought it would be! It was the scariest thing I have ever done and I think I would’ve done a much better job if I had been older.

Adults really DID have the best advice when I was a teenager and I SHOULD have listened more!!

I was happy being single, I really enjoy my own company, not that many people I know can say that.

I hate infidelity, there’s absolutely no reason to hurt someone like that and definitely no excuse. (no, not even alcohol!)

I have worked in many pubs and I NEVER have ice in a drink from a pub!! (ew!)

I battled anorexia for years and at one point I weighed under 6 stone.

The best job I have ever done was being a childminder.Vicky, Amy, Billy, Sansel, Cema, Necati, Adam & Emily have a special place in my heart, they really kept me on my toes!!

I love music and I am most emotional when listening to music, what I listen to definitely reflects my mood.

I hate seeing girls bite their nails!

I hated being ginger and wished I was a brunette…. until I got to 20 something and my hair started to get darker! I realised I LOVE being a red-head! It attracts lots of positive attention!

When I was little I wanted a VW Beetle painted red with black spots!! (like a ladybird!)

I used to self-harm and get so frustrated at people that think it’s only for attention! (that’s why self-harmers hide it!!)

I love weird pets. I have had rats, ferrets, chipmunks (my fave), lizards (my other fave), as well as the usual dogs, cats, guinea pigs. We now have a guinea pig and 1 Axolotl. (we had 2 but Bob kept biting Margaret’s limbs off!)

psychology is my hobby. (I think it’s because I love to analyse everything and everyone!)

I have an illogical paranoia about public loos. (or am I right? hmmm…) anyway I carry hand-gel EVERYWHERE and refuse to wash my hands at the sinks in them!

I can’t stand procrastinating…. I can’t stand knowing there’s things to be done, I can’t relax until things are done!

I love the Autumn.

Men do ‘fantasy football’… I do ‘fantasy girls night out’!! On my list is… Holly Willoughby, Fern Cotton, Davina mcCall, Sarah Cox, Sarah Cawood, Jade Goody (bless her), Denise Van Outen, Jo Brand, and a few others. I’d invite Paris Hilton just to take the piss out of!

I still have a tatty little ragdoll in 70’s colours called Julie and she’s not much younger than me! It’s the only thing I’ve had my whole life.

I am crap at telling jokes but I am the b*ll*cks at writing best man speeches for people!! (if I do say so myself!)

I have a ‘thing’ for Russell Brand and James Corden!

My worst habit is that I interrupt people mid-conversation… I don’t mean to but I have a shite memory and I get worried that I’ll forget what I was going to say! Sorry!

I used to do ‘voluntary’ work at a Scout Camp and I loved it!

I am a sympathetic vomiter! I vomit if I see/hear/smell vomit!!

I am STILL an E17 fan!

I have a ‘treasure box’ of each of my children. Each contains; umbilical peg thingy, scan pics, hospital wrist bands, first tooth, lock of hair, first teddy, favourite baby toy, 1st birthday cards, pictures/paintings/clay models, sewing etc. that they’ve done in school, certificates, medals, trophies, souvenirs from places they’ve been and a whole lot more! They think it’s all rubbish!! (yes hoarding!!)

I did my 1st Race for Life when I was pregnant with my daughter and I plan to do it every year with her.

I am petrified of bees and wasps!! (I think it’s because red-hair attracts them!)

I had a beloved cabbage patch kid that was stolen from me in a children’s home so my friend bought me an exact replica.(aw)

Because I wasn’t raised by my family, I have always felt like an outcast. I still feel like a loner.

I’m not a trusting person. I only trust someone 95% tops, that gives them a 5% chance at breaking my trust. Then I can’t get hurt can I? I knew there was room for doubt!

I am the only civilian that can iron properly!!!

Since my husband left the army I have realised that the ‘squaddie humour’ that all army wives become accustomed to, is now ‘sick humour’ in civvy street and women aren’t supposed to laugh at it!!!

I have brothers and sisters that I’ve never met. I envy people who have close sibling relationships.

I am a facebook and twitter addict!

 
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Posted by on June 26, 2011 in Life, Thoughts

 

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Here we are then!

I’ll start this with a little about myself.


I spent 15 years of my childhood in care and was pregnant with my 1st son aged just 17. I was a single mum of 2 by the time I was 20.

Me aged 27.

At 25 I met my husband and we were married within 5 years. We had another 2 sons, then last year we had a beautiful daughter.


My eldest now 19, (or #1 as we call him!) went to start his University Degree a few weeks ago. He’s the musician. He plays guitar, drums & violin. He is studying music technology as he has been making, recording and producing music from a little recording studio in his bedroom for a few years now.
My 17 year old (#2) is more of a ‘hands on’ lad, preferring sports. He was (until recently) doing an engineering apprenticeship. He has a hot temper but he’s got a huge heart and is immensely loyal. He’s had a tough time lately, he lost his job, his girlfriend of 2 years and is feeling it a bit. He’s decided to go and stay with his dad for a few weeks to get his head together and come back fresh when he’s more able.

My 11 year old  (#3) has some problems and he has Asperger’s Syndrome, he’s very into wrestling, I guess it’s more of an obsession than an interest, but that’s Asperger’s for you! He is a keen boxer and he’s just found out he’s being carded in the new season.
My 4 year old (#4) is a typical 4 year old. One minute he’s laughing, the next he’s having a tantrum! He is very much into the Superhero Squad… Spiderman, Ironman, Hulk… if it’s got superpowers, then he likes it and of course Toy Story!

Then there’s my 17 month old (#5) she’s adorable, my little princess. She smiles and everyone smiles, she lights up the room with her huge blue eyes and she’s so bright. She’s a model.
So I’ve had children in my teens, my 20’s and my 30’s and I have to say, it’s harder to cope with the sleep deprivation now than it ever was when I was younger!

Up until 3 years ago, I was an army wife living in St Johns Wood, but my husband left the army and we now live in Suffolk, which is ok but I so miss London, I’m a city girl at heart and I’m sure if we can ever afford to move, I’d love to go back to SJW. I guess I miss the community spirit that forces families have but I was born and bred in London and I love it there so much.

In my spare time (when I actually get some spare time!) I like to read and I also crochet like a granny! I enter (and often win!) lots of competitions too!

I am also a strong believer in karma and staying positive, always being thankful for what we have instead of dwelling on what we lack in life.

Too many people are so negative and don’t see just how very lucky they are!

 
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Posted by on June 21, 2011 in Crafting, Help!!, Kids, Parenting

 

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