I absolutely don’t know where to start with this because there is so much involved and it’s all very raw and jumbled at the moment.
To cut a long story short, I met my husband because his brother D and my cousin K were a couple with children… Unfortunately those children were neglected at best.
Anyhow to cut a very very long story short, while they were expecting baby #3 they had their 2nd house fire and K’s younger sister… my 16 year old cousin Jodie, and her (our) nieces, 2 year old Lou and 1 year old Becky were trapped upstairs. After Lou had collapsed unconscious, Jodie (we would assume consumed by smoke and knowing smoke inhalation is what kills people in fires) dropped Becky out of the window in a bid to save her life and afterwards dropped herself out. Tragically Jodie (our hero) died that sad day 3rd June 1998 and Becky’s life support was switched off a few days later on the 6th June 1998.
Within 2 years of the fire D and K’s relationship went sour and they had premature twin sons who didn’t survive who were buried in the same grave as Becky, and their (by now) 3 children were ever more neglected and finally taken into care where they stayed.
Anyway, now it’s been 16 years and we went to the grave this year and this is what we discovered. (Bearing in mind that Becky’s birthday was last month and tomorrow is the anniversary of the fire)
Now the cross has been there for around 12 years or so and has Becky’s name and date of her death wrong.
It was put there by her dad, and he also omitted K’s name and just put his and the siblings names on.
Well we tidied it up and put fresh flowers on there but now we’ve decided to try to raise the money for the headstone ourselves. Those babies deserve better than to be neglected by their parents in their deaths as they were in their lives.
The people who should care (these babies Mummy and Daddy) don’t care about those babies enough to take cards, flowers etc to the grave on their birthdays or anniversaries.
Their parents have moved on and are in relationships and have had more children…
Their parents don’t care enough about putting a few quid away every year to mark the grave with something more that a hashed cross. Their siblings aunties, uncles and nanny deserve to have somewhere they can pay their respects (though most of the uncles aunties and the nanny have always been reluctant to go to the grave due to the arguments it causes… The children were used as pawns when they were alive and their grave has been used in the same way.)
But now we are hoping to raise the funds between us to buy the headstone that they deserve.